Does this look like the face of a mother who had her kids duct-taped to a chair to watch “Mommy Dearest”

A Nebraska mom has been charged with child abuse after allegedly letting her boyfriend duct-taping her kids to chairs and forcing them to watch the film ‘Mommie Dearest‘ while depriving them of food, the Smoking Gun reports.

Mary Lucas, 28, told police that she forced her two boys — ages 4 and 7 — to watch the film because they called her the “meanest mommy.”

I admit, like everyone else reading this, I haven’t seen “Mommy Dearest” so I had to check out the preview real quick. A four minute trailer pretty much tells me all I need to know.

So, uh hey Mary Lucas, get a grip. The mom in “Mommy Dearest” was pretty decent to me. An absolute smokeshow milf played by Faye Dunaway

She is teaching her daughter about the anti pussification of America right off the bat by not letting her win in swimming, James Harrison would be proud, making her finish her dinner only have to eat your meat? Good don’t be a pussy! Buying her $300 dresses! Plus hey little crying girl, she adopted you! You could have wound up like Randy in the Wire in some shitty foster home having to fight for your keep but this rich bitch rescued you! How about some respect?

You want to scare your kids with threats of what a shitty mother could be you show them some Norma Bates in Psycho, some Mama Fratelli in the Goonies. Speaking of Mama Fratelli played by Anne Ramsey (and born in Omaha, Nebraska after a quick IMDB) was the mom in “Throw Momma From the Train” you can’t just be that naturally good at being a shitty mom, she had the roll nailed down, had to have beaten her children. Probably could have seamlessly transitioned in as Cersei or Skyler White today in shitty ass mothers.

By the way – 74 years old, Faye Dunaway still throwing in the high 80s

(Shouldn’t their be some kind of surgery for old rich people by now that gets rid of ET hands? Be less gross please old people, UGH!)


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