Iowa Just Couldn’t Help But Get In Its Own Way


Sometimes, Iowa Democrats award caucus delegates with a coin flip

In a handful of Democratic caucus precincts Monday, a delegate was awarded with a coin toss.

It happened in precinct 2-4 in Ames, where supporters of candidates Bernie Sanders and Hillary Clinton disputed the results after 60 caucus participants apparently disappeared from the proceedings.

As a result of the coin toss, Clinton was awarded an additional delegate, meaning she took five of the precinct’s eight, while Sanders received three. (Cont-

Iowa just could not help itself could it?  Things went fairly smoothly, some more tomatoes being tossed at Trump. That’s pretty cool I suppose. Cruz is a creep and won but whatever. I’ve already seen (and favorited) 500 “Iowa doesn’t matter for three and a half more years” tweets today. That’s just low hanging fruit and not much to say about it. A fairly uneventful day for Iowa being in the national spotlight.

But of course, news breaks now that Iowa is doing coin flips to decide close races and disputes with so far Hillary taking all six coin tosses.

Yeah super fair Iowa.  What you couldn’t have Bernie and Hillary draw straws to decide the Caucus?  (full disclosure- I don’t even know what a caucus is or the significance but if Iowa gets to be in the spotlight then things must be important)

I think the only true fair way to decide would be Bernie vs Hill in a tug-o-war matchup.  Survival of the fittest. I’d slate Hillary as a 2/1 favorite over that bag of bones. But at least give Bernie a fighting chance out there, don’t fuck the guy over with some fake ass Clete Blakeman coin tossing shenanigans.

Btw- where does “#feelthebern” rank among worst slogans of all time? I don’t know what the “bern” was in your generation bro, but where I come from and all the way back to like the 70s if you’re “feeling the bern” you got the clap, the dose, the drip.  Something you don’t want to be trending across social media with your name attached to it.

Be better Bernie, stay irrelevant Iowa.


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