Craigslists Missed Connections is undoubtedly one of the creepiest corners of the internet. So it should be no surprise that I’m a frequent visitor to it. Can’t say I’m surprised I’ve never seen a girl on there typing about some dad bod with a hint of muscle, man bun with an unkempt beard she saw buying chicken. But maybe one day. I wouldn’t run from it. I live for that. But I also live for shaming other people. Grow up, be a man, be a woman, go get rejected face to face like I do. Lets just check out page one in Omaha today.
All of the following are real posts from Omaha Missed Connections and my thoughts.
Friday – LaQuinta Blue Hat White Guy on 2nd Floor Hallway – m4m (LaQuinta)
I passed you in the hall. We were both waiting for a hot Latin guy in a certain room. Which room number was it? I saw you possibly check me out, and I definitely checked you out.
You were middle aged white guy with blue hat and a bit of facial hair. What room number was the guy in we wanted to see?
I thought you were sexy and I’d love to meet up for anon top or btm
Well fuck. I regret this already.
Is there a Glory Hole at La Quinta? ….. Asking for a friend.
Beercade last night – m4w (Benson)
I saw you at beercade last night and you were with a group of about 7 girls. You never left your circle of friends and I didn’t have the courage to come up to your group to talk with you. You were wearing a green dress with a leafy design on them. I thought you were so so pretty and thought there might have been a few times where we both shot glances at each other. If it’s you tell me something distinguishable about me.
Beercade Dress with Leaves – m4w (Benson)
You were the cute girl with the leafyish green dress. You were in a circle of girls and didn’t ever leave the group. I sensed that you saw me looking over at you a few times, but I didn’t have the courage to come over and start a conversation when you were surrounded by 6 others. I thought you were so so pretty and wished i would have talked to you. If it was you message me what color jacket and shirt I was wearing, or something distinguishable about me.
Hey freak. She’s just not that into you. There was no need to post it twice worded differently. Take it easy dude. If anything she should file a preemptive restraining order against you.
Amanda – Blondie – m4w (Harrison)
We met online and I was smitten. You were kind and amazing… I then said something and was a complete ass. I am sorry. I hope that we could have met and played.. It would have been magic..
Hey bud. Hot tip in your quest for Amanda. You met her on-line, so uhhh go back to the meeting spot on-line and try again. Unless she blocked you and if that’s the case stay away. I can’t imagine what you said that made you a “complete ass” was and now you’re like some Werewolf howling at the moon for her on the Craigslist missed connections. That must have been some super creepy stuff.
Costco – m4w (West O)
Almost every Sunday we cross paths and your so amazing every week… We make eye contact, look each other over and exchange looks. We both are married but I would be so game to spend some time with you and see what happens…..
Shopping and in lust
West O Park – m4w (West O)
You were with your family and I was with mine. We kept exchanging glances and then we finally talked by the swings… You are simply amazing! I was smitten and want to talk more!
Put “MPS” in the email if you see this
I’m not posting all of these but this is the fourth time I’ve seen someone “smitten” over the person they ran into. When did Omaha become Mississippi in 1950?
Taco Bell on 108th and Maple – m4w (Omaha)
This happened a long time ago…
I was in Taco Bell over my lunch break waiting on food and you came up beside me. We waited for what seemed like hours and then you looked over and smiled at me and asked if I ordered the most complicated order ever.
You really looked cute in that moment and I wish we would have talked more because I think it could definitely have gone somewhere…
If you see this, I hope you reply! I would love to connect with you!
A case of two people who evidently were eating Taco Bell while not wasted. I gotta say I’m on board. You two gross people deserve each other.
You lived in Tara heights apts – m4w
So this was quite some time ago…years and years ago…you lived in Tara Heights Apts….upper floors…had a deck…faced the side with houses…anyways…you were older than me…by 5 years or so…u might be late 30’s lower 40’s now…you had brown hair..pretty eyes….you were a smoker….I can’t remember your name for the life of me..I’m taller slimmer..had tattoos in certain places…but..we talked for a bit through messaging and phone….I came over..u were getting out of the shower and one thing led to another…u were satisfied for sure…we met a few more times and you even gave me a “man candle”..we kind of fell out of touch or idk what happened…if this is you and remember anything about me or think you might…message me and talk with me…SEND ME A PIC and you will get mine back…describe me…wish we could meet up again…you were a sweetheart sexy little lady…send a pic to show me who you are
That read like some softcore pornography. I really thought “Man Candle” was some kind of Sex act like Cleveland Steamer that I hadn’t heard of yet. After a quick google search I was wrong, really is just a candle for a man. Let down city.
The Lovely Brunette Post Carrier – m4w (N 38th & Franklin)
I notice you every day at the job site. You are sexy & gorgeous. Seeing you walk, showing off your sexy legs & delivering mail is the highlight of my day. I hit on you multiple times at the job site when you delivered mail. Anyways I would like to take you out to dinner.
Does anyone know a lovely brunette mail carrier that may work on 38th and Farnam? If so send her this LINK, before it’s too late.
BOB IN BLUE TRUCK – m4m (CB)
…. You bought some 100mg v (sildenafil citrate) from me Monday, left your phone in your truck then u asked me to write my cell # down, which I did, but u ran off without it? if u need more, get to me this way Dave
Handyman – m4m
You were going to do some work on my home. We exchange a few text and you got irritated with me because I wouldn’t show you something. I would like to talk with you. Tell me what you wanted me to send so I will know it is you.
Where are you tom watson – t4m (51503)
Remember those secret times when your girlfriend was at work and I would come pick you up and you would get trashed on vodka and 420. Then you would suck my cock and let me fuck your ass over and over. You always said you liked prostate orgasms. It’s been a while we started hitting it in 2008 and continued our loving until a month ago now I haven’t heard from you. I so want to be in your manhole again. Please just let me love you I have vodka and 420 baby
That’s all I can handle for now. If you enjoyed please like and share and I will do more.